I keep wanting to do a grand unified essay about all these, but I haven't pulled it together yet. My thoughts have been grimmer than yours. I keeping thinking about becoming poor. This terrifying essay sets the microscale, what it is like for a person to become poor. Here is a story about a town being poor. And a county, when one of their resources goes away. The thing I keep noticing is that cutting back early is the key to lasting. These people have what looks like a path forward. But it worries me that the bloggers I read are all using a growth economy as the standard, rather than a steady-state economy or a descent-based economy.
So I'm thinking about that. I was sorry to read about the tragic shooting in your neighborhood. When you brought food to the relatives of the deceased, how did you find them?
I totally love this song by High Places.
You know what I would love to link to, but can't? All the resources for people who are interested in co-parenting. I'd love to show you the forums I'm reading and the matching services for people who want to co-parent. I'd totally link to the blogs where people write about their experiences. Except, you know, I CAN'T. I don't think they're out there. There're a few in Britain, but that's all I can find. I've called around and gotten confirmation. There is no infrastructure for finding someone else who might want to have and raise a kid with you, not in Northern California. Wouldn't you think it would be in California as much as it would be anywhere? Yeah, there isn't any.
This is so frustrating for me. I'm sure of my decision to have kids, starting soon, but seriously daunted by the prospect of doing it alone. I'm willing, but I've seen what that's like. My friends are awesome and generous about offering help and I'm sure that when I'm in it, I'll make the arrangements I need. But it looks hard. It also looks like the first thing to go is my workout. I'll make that trade if it is necessary. But I don't want to. If finding another involved parent is possible, I'm interested.
But I can't even get to the point of negotiating the difficulties of that, because so far as I can tell, there isn't a locus for potential co-parents. Everyone I've asked confirms, yeah, it is all ad hoc. That's ridiculous. There are so many people who could be served by this. Some gays and lesbians, of course. But I think of the women I know who wanted kids but aged out waiting for a romantic partner. Some might have been better off with a co-parent, even if that isn't the ideal of a romantic partner. This gives men who want kids another option too. So I don't get why this niche is nearly entirely unserved.